From the mouths of babes

Kids are cooler than adults.  Most of the time.

Example 1: Pain
Kids don’t define a day by the number of injuries they sustained.  Today I’m really sore from training, I’ll be sore tomorrow too, and in a few weeks, that’s all I’ll remember about this week.  I won’t remember that fun conversation I had with Michelle, or how, when she said, “I wanna learn how to do a flying kick,” and I said, “I can teach you that.  Check it out!” that I did a flying kick, followed by a jumping spinning roundhouse kick and almost nailed some lady that came into the office just then right in the FACE.  If I hadn’t written all this down, all I’d think about today is how much I want to use my friend’s hot tub because I’m so fucking sore that it’s hurting my back muscles to type this.

incapable of human speech

ALL HAIL HYPNOTOAD

Example 2: Truth
Most adults mush the truth around like spackle.  They use just enough to get the job done, and leave the rest sealed in a bucket.  Most kids will tell the truth about anything.
me: What does the frog say?
kid: Frogs don’t talk.
me: [Holy shit, he’s totally right.]

Example 3: Focus

adults hate crayons

Adults think kids have trouble concentrating.  They don’t.  Kids have amazing focus, they just don’t focus on stupid bullshit like getting dressed and doing homework.  But put them in front of their favorite toy, or a picture book, or box of crayons and a clean sheet of paper, and everything else in the world disappears completely.  They don’t worry about other crap.  They can do absolutely one thing at a time.  That’s what adults call meditation.

Example 4: Imagination
Fuck adults and their complete lack of creativity.  I joked with a group of kids and parents that I wish I had tentacles instead of hands so I could grab onto stuff better.  The kids laughed and said, “eew!”  The adults were just horrified and uncomfortable.  One of them actually looked sorry for me.  But the kids would not shut up about it.  “What if you had more hands instead?”  Jesus Christ, why didn’t I think of that?  Awesome.

I need to try to define my day with the funny, good stuff that happens, instead of what I’m doing this very second (being pissed that I have to teach a private lesson after the regular classes today, plus I invited my coworker buddy over to watch some anime or whatever, so I won’t have time to go hot tubbing, which is all I want to do right now because I can’t remember the last time I was in so much muscle-pain, and it’s honestly starting to freak me out).

I’m working on it.

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About Toph Beifong

www.tigerlilytoph.com View all posts by Toph Beifong

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