goodness, life

Neighborhood watch

There was an orange and black neighborhood watch sticker on on the window next to the back door, in the laundry room of the house I grew up in.  It featured the silhouette of some creepy guy with a popped collar and a fedora for some reason (gotta look out for those Baby Boomers, they’ll git’chya!).  I thought it was just a limited issue thing, but then I saw this outside one of my favorite ramen restaurants (Daikokuya in Little Tokyo), and it made me wonder if this image was more highly distributed, and therefore better-known than I had previously thought.

Regardless, it was nice to see a familiar face 🙂

LA's most wanted

LA’s most wanted

UPDATE: 11:40pm
This guy is everywhere!  A quick Google search for ‘neighborhood watch’ and this guy pops up all over the damn place (although occasionally he seems to be wearing a mask, and strongly resembles Homestar Runner).

 

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goodness, life

This is my president

 

I helped elect this man, twice.  For that, I am proud.

Share photos on twitter with Twitpic

 

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goodness, humor, life, manfolk

Hi, my name is Awkward

I’m still doing shit like this (in my head).  I feel like a child.  I feel dumb.  I need to accept the fact that I will:
a) never be one of those super cool adults that have their shit together
b) never not do shit like this

sarahseeandersen.tumblr.com

sarahseeandersen.tumblr.com

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badness, humor, life, manfolk

The sleep issue

Boyfriend’s out of town.  I’ve killed two whole bugs.  I did all the dishes I’ve been allowing to accumulate over the past week.

Side note: The joy of not doing my dishes has literally made me giggle aloud a few times recently.  Needless to say, I’m enjoying Boyfriend being out of town a whole lot more than expected.  It’s pretty fun, setting my own schedule, not checking in with anyone, sitting around watching Buffy all afternoon and writing my blog [like right now], drinking tea in front of the TV, not paying attention to Boyfriend… overall, a very relaxing, fun experience so far.

But getting to sleep is still a problem.  I found this chart to explain.  It does a pretty good job (except for the screenplay part: replace that with creating imaginary conflicts in which I dominate).

pretty damn accurate

pretty damn accurate

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goodness, life

French oils and light

There’s something to be said for the treatment of light in French oil paintings in the 1800s.  This piece hides it like a treasure.  Dawn hides behind an antiquated stone wall, sliding through the doorway while a few locals relax into their pastoral errands on a crisp morning.  You can almost see small puffs of the horse’s breath as it grazes, and hear the gentle bustle of the town waking up behind its tall, silent guardian gate.

Porte de la Reine at Aigues-Mortes by Jean-Frédéric Bazille

Porte de la Reine at Aigues-Mortes by Jean-Frédéric Bazille (click for full size)

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goodness, life

My old friend

I just found out another friend of mine from way back in the day (elementary school this time) is a big, fat lesbian.  I also found out she just got married (like two days ago).  The first thing that occurred to me was what a shitty friend I am not to have noticed that not only is she a lesbian, she’s also been dating someone seriously enough to marry her.  God I suck.

But good for them!  So exciting.  I wrote on her Facebook wall congratulating her, and letting her know how happy I was for her.  Then I started feeling all misty-eyed about Obama winning his second term, all the women taking office, all the gay rights measures that passed (4 for 4 ain’t too shabby), and I went a little overkill on the well-wishing.  I messaged her partner (now wife) to congratulate her, and to deliver a poorly veiled threat of violence if she messed with my old friend.

Hey Danielle,

I knew Charlene back in grade school, and though we’ve basically lost touch aside from being Fb friends, I wanted to let you know how happy I am for you both, and congratulate you on your wedding.

She and I sang in a choir together in our teens; I remember her being very kind, and sharp as a tack. She also struck me as a bit fragile. All the kids in school knew it had to be tough being the new kid whose father was the new pastor. And I remember James [her little brother] getting into trouble here and there. I realized during one of the fleeting moments of clarity I experienced in my early teens that she had a lot on her plate, but she handled it like a champ.

Please treat her well. She is, and will always be, my friend. Even if we haven’t spoken in years, I’ll still break your knees if you hurt her. Just kidding. But not really 🙂:)

Yes, I cried a little, sitting on the floor in my friend’s apartment while Obama was declared winner of the election.  But this really brought home what was at stake.  My old friend.  I am so happy for you.

happy tears in Minnesota over the smallest of victories: being told that your kind of love should not, after all, be outlawed

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badness, life

I don’t need a makeover (and neither do you)

Picture, if you will, a confident, happy, athletic young girl.  One of her friends says she needs a makeover.  The others girls nearby start to chatter about what they would do to fix her hair, face and clothing.  Picture this confident, happy, athletic girl, listening to all the little ways her friends find her inadequate, not feminine enough, and generally lacking.  Watch while she tightens her ponytail and brushes her hair out of her face self-consciously.  Suddenly, playing football with the boys every morning before class is embarrassing.  Winning arm wrestling contests is no longer allowed to be a source of pride.  Watch her face fall while her friends tell her with great enthusiasm that her priorities are all wrong, that her appearance is a problem, that her favorite activities are something “tomboys” do (read: not ok).  Her best friend looks her up and down, and says, “Yeah, we could do a lot for your makeover.”

The below video sums it up with stark accuracy:

I struggled to find a group of friends who did not do this to me on a more or less annual basis.  I’m 28 now, and I’ve finally built good friendships with people who know me well enough to see that I have my own fashion sense, my own concept of beauty, and my own set of standards for what I find admirable and feminine.  I thought I was past all that childish bullshit.  Silly me.

One of my coworkers made an off-handed comment today: “I should give you a make-over.”  It took all my strength not to throw my purse at her fat face.

lose some weight, fatass

First: What the fuck goes through people’s heads just before they say “You need a makeover”?  Do they really think their opinion about someone else’s appearance would override that person’s own opinion?
Second: What do they think people’s reactions will be?  “Thank GOD you brought it up.  I’ve been sitting in my cubicle for years just WAITING for someone to FIX me!”

When I told her that was insulting, she said, “No it’s not,” because she would know, being the recipient of the comment OH WAIT, NO, that was me.  I asked her what was wrong with what I was wearing, to which she (naturally) replied, “Nothing,” and then, “it’s just to enhance yourself.”  WTF does that even mean?  Why do I need enhancing?  What the hell was she talking about?

Of course what she meant was, “You need to stop wearing pants and wear more dresses, makeup, heels, and do your hair for once.  You need to dress more femininely.”  I’ve had… I’m gonna go ahead and say a few dozen people tell me I need a makeover over the course of my 28 years.  In case you’re thinking, “A few dozen people can’t be wrong, better call Bravo and get Tim Gunn on this girl stat,” here’s a quick rundown of my general appearance:

Casual attire: fitted jeans (skirts when it’s hot) and t-shirts (if they’re good enough for Natalie Portman, they’re good enough for me)
Office attire: slacks (dresses or skirts when it’s hot) and blouses or sweaters with flat shoes
Overall
-I wear clothing that is clean, presentable, and unoffensive.
-I never wear makeup.  Ever.
-I wear my hair in a ponytail almost every day.  I never dye, blow dry, curl, or otherwise alter my hair.  It’s long, dark, straight, shiny, healthy, and often envied.
-I never wear heels of any height (I’m 5’8″ btw, a solid 2-3 inches taller than my coworker).
-I wear deodorant almost every day at work (especially when it’s hot).
-I almost never wear jewelry (my ears keep closing up).  I wear one simple necklace every day: a citrine stone on a brown thread.
-My teeth are a normal white-ish color.
-I have always had clear skin.

this was once considered the height of fashion. I rest my case.

Picture the person I have just described.  What makes this person in need of a makeover?  That’s right, nothing.  Not only that, I like the way I dress, and so do the people who compliment my clothing (both at the office and elsewhere).  I look great and I feel good.  What’s the fucking problem?

Obviously there’s no problem with me.  The problem is with her: I’m not dressing/presenting myself the way she (or any other vapid cow who has told me I need a makeover) thinks I should dress/present myself.  So who does a makeover help?  The subject (read: victim), or the observers who inflict it upon them?  What’s the point of a makeover?

There are loads of (ambush) makeover shows out there, and they all follow roughly the same formula.  Let’s map it out:
-Hear how painfully sad the subject’s friends are for her because her fashion sense is inadequate in some way (in their opinion).
-Show footage of the subject wearing one of her typical (read: hideous) outfits.  Cue collective cringe.
-Ambush the subject with a camera crew and token “Celebrity Makeover Expert” (CME) who has arrived just in time to “help” the subject.
-Watch the subject defend her clothing as “comfortable.”
-CME and subject’s “friends” shame the subject until she feels forced to obey CME.

getting drunk is the best way to feel fashionable. an inconvenient purse, standing pidgeon-toed in heels, and laughing at nothing works too, apparently.

Each step is necessary to convince the viewer that the otherwise useless CME is a valuable contributor to our society.  It assures the audience by affirming the status quo, and feeds on their inadequacies by touting fashion sense as something precious, difficult to attain, and very necessary.  It’s genius.  But who does it help?  What’s the point?

The audience is a willing participant in this circus, which cannot always be said of the subjects (poor little lambs).  This is the part where we turn back to the little girl being gently rebuked by her supposed friends for her natural tendencies toward athleticism and “tomboyishness.”  Who are they helping by encouraging her to be more like them?  More recently, why did my coworker think she was being generous, when really she was being… I don’t know… hypocritical?

most women look like this to me. less is more, ladies.

For example, I am not enslaved by the need to wear makeup and “do” my hair every day.  Many women (including my coworker) are.  Why would she want to submit me to the same enslavement she currently suffers under?  She complains about the time commitment and energy it takes to get ready in the morning, and how she feels “naked” without makeup on.  Why would she wish that on me?  What is going on in her head?

As I left the office, my coworker said to a student nearby, “You just watch, one day she’s gonna come in here wearing a pink dress, curled hair, makeup, the whole thing, hahaha.”  I walked back to her office and blurted out, “I DO have a pink dress!  A brightpink dress!  I’ve worn it TWICE!  I wear dresses all the time!”  She said, “Really?  Oh.”  She’s so (insert insult to intelligence and ability to observe the obvious here), she doesn’t even notice when I do meet her ridiculous standards.

The bottom line is this: An offer for a makeover is an insult veiled by a childish level of enthusiasm for the dubious honor of being considered fashionable, a title unfairly withheld/bestowed by charlatans parading their “expertise” regarding a subject so fleeting and subjective, that any claim to have conquered it is a fantasy.  Simply put: just because you’re excited doesn’t mean I shouldn’t be insulted.  I’m not threatening you, my job security, the innocence of children, or the staunchly religious with my fashion choices.  What the fuck should I care about what you think fashionable is?  Why shouldn’t I just wear what I want?

No really.  Why?

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goodness, life

Secret friends

super gay 🙂

I got pulled into Little Mole Boss’s office today to get an earful about how she’s heard that I’m not “friendly” enough, and that I’m not “giving 100%.” She recognizes that my part-time position here is not super mentally stimulating, but she still expects top-notch work, which is an enigma as far as I’m concerned.  I was also instantly annoyed at the assumption that women should be ‘friendly’ all the time.  There’s a guy in our office who is terse and occasionally downright rude, and he’s worked here for six years or so.  I’ve never said an unkind word to anyone in this office in the two years I’ve worked here, so why… *sigh*  It was not a good start to the day.

But then it got better. Grabbing lunch around noon, I noticed the black woman running the register had two linked female symbols tattooed to her arm. I’m a huge supporter of gay marriage and the gay community in general, so I said, “I like your tattoo.”
She froze with her arm out so I could get a better look. “Thanks, you know what it is?”
“Yep.”
She smiled back, “Are you one?”
I gave her a big smile and said, “Nope, but I got your back.”
She gave me a tiny salute and said, “Thanks for your support.”

And that is why today was a good day.

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badness, humor, life, school

My professor sucked

I thought it best not to post this until a couple of weeks after my grades got posted, lest the professor in question do a search and find my blog.  I can’t say I honestly care anymore, so I’m posting it.  Naturally, names have been changed.

My first semester of graduate school is over (except for those two papers I have yet to complete).  Once those are done, I have a week before the next semester starts, at which point I will stop having a life once again, only this time I’m prepared, lol.

The funny thing about learning how to teach is that I’m constantly checking the teaching methods of my instructors.  I took two classes this semester: one instructor was awesome (insightful, encouraging, engaging, the whole nine yards), while my other instructor was… worthy of the anonymous scathing review I just left for him (they could not have been more different.  This semester was weird).  It went something like this:

my professor grading my papers

What are the instructor’s main strengths?
[something about how he got along with another student with a similar upbringing, go figure]

How could the instructor improve?
He should pour himself a stiff drink and read my “additional comments.”

Additional Comments
-He said “friggin a” on the second day of class after becoming frustrated by the questions asked by students (time stamp: between 2:23:40-2:25:13).  The student he said this to was visibly embarrassed.  Toward the end of the semester, that student told me that he was still reticent to speak in this class because of that experience, even though two and a half months had passed since then.

-He did not leave time for students to formulate and ask questions.

-He often spent the first 30-45 minutes of class monologuing about the reading while referring to a PowerPoint presentation, and reviewed the readings almost verbatim.  This is particularly ironic since the necessity of student participation in classroom discussion was often a topic.  We were taught through monologue that we should not monologue a lesson to our students, since this is not conducive to learning. 

-On one occasion, he emailed students 25 minutes before class was scheduled to start that he could not attend, saying he would record the lecture for us to view later.  He sent an email four days later that the lecture was on the website, however it was not.  Two students mentioned that they could not find the recorded lecture on the website two days before class; two more mentioned that they had the same difficulty the day before class, all without response from the professor.  It was not until a student suggested, during class, that he may have uploaded it for private viewing rather than public viewing that he discovered that was the problem.  He blamed the changes made to the online platform.

-Students’ group contributions were cut short and treated as unimportant.  During a week 8 class (time stamp: between 2hr and 2hr8min), we were told to keep it short, and pretend we were calling into a radio show.  He said, “You got 30 seconds!”  He blamed the length of the class.

-Turning in papers early was impossible to do without being punished.  The class before the due date, we always found a problem with the directions that demanded that I alter my paper and resubmit it.  Inept Instructor marked me down in one instance when he said he would not due to conflicting instructions (when I reminded him, he said he would fix it–three weeks later I sent him an email reminding him that he said he would do this.  Only then did my grade reflect the changes he said he would make weeks prior).  He said he needed to check his rubric to see how many points he allots to each portion of the paper in question, then correct his mistake.  The second time there were problems with a paper I handed in early, I resubmitted the paper with corrections, but he graded the wrong one, and asked me to fix problems I had already fixed (and handed in) a week prior.  He blamed the class for not reading instructions closely enough, ignoring the fact that instructions for the various parts of assignments were often found in different documents, and just as often, didn’t match what the other documents’ instructions.

-He incorrectly pointed out a problem with my APA formatting on a paper (and docked me for it).  When I emailed him pointing out the error, his reply was, “That’s awesome.”  He restored one point to my paper, bringing it from an A- to an A.  I heard from another student in the class that he mistakenly docked her for the same non-issue, and recommended that she bring it to his attention.  I’m concerned about how many other students he may have wrongly docked for this same issue, and how it affected their grades.  Although he changed my grade, he never admitted there was a problem, and dodged any blame for his mistake.

-He sent an email to the class reminding us that there would be no class on Labor Day, which would have been very considerate if he had not sent it at 8:35pm on Labor Day.

-He sent curt emails to the students for not handing in their papers on time, only to discover that he could not receive emails from non-USC email addresses.    He blamed his IT department, and took no credit for the mistake.  If a student were to encounter a problem like this, he would be penalized for not checking our systems beforehand to avoid this problem (we are told, for example, that it is the students’ responsibility to check our cameras and audio setup for problems well before class to deal with any potential issues because if a technical problem keeps us from being in class, we are punished by being considered absent, and receive no credit for that day’s class time).

During the last class, when a student asked where the class evaluation form could be found, Inept Instructor said he had no idea.  He blamed the online platform format for hiding it.  The professor for my other class not only knew where it was, but on the last day of class, directed us to it and reminded us to fill it out.

thank you, interwebz, for reading my mind

-I write this the day after the last class: 1/3 of my assignments remain ungraded.  In addition, none of my class participation points have been posted.  If I have received credit for going to class, I have yet to see evidence of it in the grades section of the online platform.  Of all the forum postings, papers, and class time scores (not counting the final paper, for which the due date has not yet passed), only seven of the 23 scores possible (30%) for this class have been graded and put on the online platform.  When a student asked Inept Instructor a month ago if he would be putting more of our grades up, Inept Instructor replied, “I think you’ve figured it out…I’m slow 🙂 Your analysis papers are graded and posted. I will be assigning individual forum posting and class participation grades.”  The latter statement, at least, has proven to be untrue.  I wonder what he thinks the purpose of the “grades” section of the online platform is, if not to PUT OUR GRADES UP.

One running theme in Inept Instructor’s teaching style was a complete lack of accountability on his part.  Though all these mistakes, both big and small, were clearly Inept Instructor’s fault, not only did he take zero credit for any of them, but the only apology Inept Instructor ever offered was when he apologized for not being able to make it to class.  Of course, he voiced this apology to his camera when he recorded the make-up class, effectively eliminating our ability to respond to him as a group, and sapping the apology of any authenticity. 

I did not find Inept Instructor to be a motivating, interesting, or well-organized instructor.  He did not seem to grasp the concept that, “Just because you’re talking doesn’t mean your students are learning.”  I learned more about what NOT to do in a classroom from watching Inept Instructor than I did from our readings and discussions.  Thanks for a valuable learning experience, Inept Instructor.

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goodness, life

Live, damn you!

totally appropriate

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https://wordpress.com/support/copyright-and-the-dmca/

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