goodness, life, nerd

Dracula, my love

The original Dracula is my favorite ghost story.  It’s easy to see that it’s not the ultimate literary novel of its time, but it’s a fun read and a creepy story set in a time where if you were stranded somewhere, you were totally fucked.  If you get sick in a foreign country, you’re screwed.  If you don’t know how to kill the thing that’s coming after you and your loved ones, get your affairs in order, because it might be time to die.

nice job, google

nice job, google

Obviously I’m not a fan of how prominently Christianity comes swooping in to save the day (of course the Count can’t enter a tomb that’s been sealed off using putty mixed with the holy sacrament, DUH), but that’s sorta part of the charm of this story; it’s full of silly superstition and stolid, antiquated reliance on the impregnable defense afforded to the faithful.  It’s pretty cute.

And the action!  Fight scenes!  Storms!  Abandoned vessels washing up on shore!  Giant wolves!  Hypnosis!  Seduction!  Hidden treasure!  All this and more!  Written in the style of the turn of the century, who wouldn’t want to read it?

SPOILER:
The part on the ship is what makes this a truly horrifying story.  It’s the strongest part of the story in my opinion.  If that part doesn’t hook you, you have my permission to stop reading, and continue your inevitable march toward the end of an unfortunate, unremarkable life.  You schmuck.

READ ME, PUNY MORTAL

READ ME, PUNY MORTAL

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badness, goodness, manfolk

There will always be a spider

looks legit

I am not a fan of bugs.  I think they’re amazing in a cold, scientific way, but if they could all die without adverse effects on the planet and its flora and fauna, I would be happy.  Once, when Boyfriend and I first started dating, I saw a spider on the ceiling of his bedroom and squeaked, “Onoes boyfwend a buggie-bug!”  Bear in mind I’ve sparred with men more than twice my weight with two feet of height on me.  Boyfriend was delighted to see a clearly very vulnerable killing machine of a girlfriend, and came to my rescue armed with a tissue.  Thank you, Boyfriend.

Here are two emails I sent him on May 29th at 1130pm when he was out of town for a couple of weeks:

BOYFRIEND THERE’S A SPIDER!  It’s on the table, and it’s coming over here gaaaaaaaaaaaah!!
I blew on it.  It went away.  I think it’s on the floor.
Crap I can’t find it.  BOYFRIEND THERE’S A SPIDER.

15 minutes later:

Calico found it, she’s attacking it.  She stopped.  She keeps smelling it and watching it walk away.  JUST EAT IT GAH it’s under my chair!  WHY ISN’T IT DEAD YET.
Wait, did she just eat it?  Haha yeah, she ate it.  Good kitty.

I have recently come to a horrifying realization: There will always be a spider.  So I either have to always have to have a spider-killer around (Teacher Roommate fills that role when Boyfriend isn’t around), or I’ll have to get brave enough to face my fear of crawling things.

Boyfriend it is.

Side note: DO NOT Google “huge spider” if you want to sleep this week.

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